It’s something many strive for.
It’s something that even more don’t feel capable of.
Influence is one of Brendon Burchard’s high performance habits and I struggle with this one. Actually, a lot of my clients struggle with this, too. We don’t see ourselves as influential. We are just out there living our lives. Or so we think.
People are watching. And we are influencing them with our every move and every word…whether we intend to or not.
Truth is, we influence the people around us ALL. DAY. LONG.
The challenge is scaling that influence to reach further, do more, and have greater impact.
Whenever I talk about influence, I will ask coaching clients if they think of themselves as an influencer. This is either met with an uncomfortable laugh or diverted gaze to the floor and a definite, “No.”
When I think of an influencer, my brain instantly goes to those oUt-ThERe people on Instagram in their bikinis pretending to influence us to buy something (insert eye roll here). So let me get your head away from that… I’m not talking about Instagram Influencers.
I am talking about REAL WORLD influencers.
Watch out, if you have children you’re a way bigger influencer than you think you are. You know you’ve seen your kid do something and wondered where they learned that from… only to realize it was from YOU. I’m laughing right now thinking about all the kids I know who have said a curse word only for their parents to realize that the kids definitely heard it from them. Would that be you, Mom or Dad?
I’m also smiling about the good acts of influence I’ve seen, like:
My niece who cares that every kid is included in a game
A kid in my youth group who is always saying good things about his brother
My step-son, Jared, who pretends hanging out with little kids is annoying but really he loves teaching them things like arm wrestling, how to trick the dogs, and to play different games.
These kids learned these things from someone. They are watching.
So, who else is watching?
Spoiler alert! Your team is DEFINITELY watching.
You may think they don’t notice when you praise an employee – but they do.
You may think they don’t notice when you take the time to teach them something – but they do.
And you may think they don’t notice that you leave the office early on Friday afternoons – but, oh boy, they do.
You’re an influencer whether you ever wanted to be one or not. So how do you make sure that these people are picking up on the good things more than the bad things?
What can you do to be a positive influence?
The thing is, our lives are made up of habits. You may think you don’t really have any habits, but you do. Waking up early, sleeping in, having that ice cream late at night, going for a run every day, etc. Habits don’t just exist when they are good habits. Habits exist no matter if they are good or bad.
So ask yourself, “Which habits – the GOOD or BAD – are influencing my team the most?” (Remember, family is a team too.)
All you can do is evaluate, grieve your bad habits for a minute or two, and then choose to be better. By the way, I’m just assuming you said that you have some bad habits – because I’m sure we all do. (I’m not the only one – right???)
The key to being a positive influencer is to live with integrity and intention.
Know what good habits you want to put into place and then intentionally make it happen. Steven Covey once said that “common sense isn’t common practice.” Holy Moly is that true. We all know what we SHOULD be doing. But we avoid it…it’s hard, it’s uncomfortable, it’s not convenient…and the list goes on and on.
If you are truly committed to being a positive influencer in any area of your life, choose your good habits and then be intentional about practicing them. Practice them even when no one is watching. That’s the integrity piece, doing the right thing when no one else will know.
People will notice that, no matter what, you do your best. They will see that you have discipline and integrity behind your words and actions. They will be influenced by you and strive to be better, too.
The cool part is, the more intentional you are about doing the good habits, the more likely your bad habits will fall out of the picture. Then you become an even more positive influence!
So, the magic question… What kind of influencer do you want to be?
What do you need to STOP or START doing TODAY to be a better influence tomorrow?
Are you ready to make a change?
I’m here to help you fill those influencer shoes and cheer you on.
P.S. You might find this article helpful, too.
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